On compassion

re-learning how to nurture ourselves and others

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, compassion is the “sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it”, but I think that it is so much more than this.

Compassion is something tangible, a feeling, an essence¹. We sense it in our bodies when we feel it and receive it.

To me, compassion is warmth and light. Compassion is like the feeling of returning to a warm home after a brisk winter walk. Compassion is a sigh of relief. It is a settling into who you have always been. It is a confidence that you are loved and held. It is a “I just thought of you” text from a treasured friend. It is someone safe, looking into your eyes and saying “you make so much sense”. It is a table, set for you with food to nourish your body and soul. A place to belong. Compassion is timeless. It is never ending. Compassion is a new beginning, a reconnection, a promise of togetherness. Compassion is a healing balm² and a warm embrace.

found on Pinterest, by Lacey McKeever

Compassion has a voice. It’s essence is carried through our words that we offer with love to ourselves but also to others. It lives through our expression of who we truly are, sourced from the never ending well within us.

Compassion says..

“I will never leave you”

“I see you completely and you make sense”

“I know and see how hard you are trying, you are doing enough”

“I treasure your heart, I want to know you more. Please share with me your thoughts and feelings, I am here to listen”

“You make sense, always”

“I can tell that you care so much”

“I see how sad/lonely/scared you feel right now. I will stay with you for as long as you need me”

“I care about how you feel. How can I support you?”

“What do you need? What do you love? What lights you up?”

“I will always value and accept you”

Compassion goes beyond just a feeling. It mobilises us to move towards ourselves and others who are needing our tenderness and love. It is a force that exists around us and in us to propel us into action. Compassion is doing.

I took me a long time to reacquaint myself with compassion, to relearn how to operate in this way. To move towards instead of moving away when things got hard. To not abandon myself but instead to allow compassion to move me back to myself, to the hurting parts that needed this healing balm.

I say relearn because I believe we are born with compassion as our foundation. It is our birthright. Have you ever seen the way a child responds when they hear another child crying? Or if they find an animal that is hurting? They are moved with compassion. They are curious and unafraid to move towards the hurt. This is our origin and as adults, we are uncovering the unhelpful messages from our culture that get in the way of us connecting to this beautiful, healing state within us.

So, how do we do it? How do we return to compassion?

Below are a couple of prompts for you to explore, if you feel called. They will help to bring compassion up to your conscious brain and support you to begin practicing compassion towards yourself and others. Some of tools are from The Compassion Method™️ (which I am certified in through Laura’s school) and I have permission from Laura to share them in my work, which I am endlessly grateful for. 🧡