“I don’t know if I have ever felt this good on a trip before. I feel open, curious, playful, present. It is like everything you would hope to feel on a trip or special occasion but I usually don’t feel. It makes me think about what’s possible for me in a few years, even ten years from how. How could could things feel?”.. I sent in a voice memo to a friend during our recent trip to NC/SC.
Since we returned to Florida I have been thinking about how good I felt, not just during those days away but for the last 9 months or so. I feel like how I wished I could for so so long. As I’ve reflected, I recognised that goodness sticks out to me as something that has been the biggest resource to me. Practicing feeling it, soaking it up when it comes and returning to those moments in my imagination often.
It’s that simple and (sometimes) that hard.
For so many of us, we are used to feeling pretty crappy most of the time, if we’re really honest with ourselves. It might be hard to put a finger on it, but something feels off and there’s this longing for something different. Surely this isn’t it? I have been there. It has taken four years of intentional self exploration and support for my body to open up enough to allow goodness, beauty and pleasure really impact me deeply. It has taken slowing down to savour these things after a lifetime (literally) of spending most of my time focussing on the things that were hard or painful.
I am here.
And I know there is only more for me to experience.
I write my monthly delights as part of my practice of savouring these beautiful moments and to inspire you to also take the time to reflect on the lovely things in your life, too. It is so fun for me collect these lists but there is also a depth to it, as allowing my body to remember the good things creates a signal of safety to the nervous system, bringing regulation and grounding. Another way I like to practice allowing goodness to effect me is to notice it in real time and bring words or thoughts to the specific experience, explaining it back to myself in detail. Recently this looked like thinking about the way the warm ocean felt on my skin as I floated with my ears underwater, creating so much quiet and stillness as I gazed up to the cloudy sky. Or noticing how good climbing into bed felt after a warm shower, post swim, the comforting way the clean sheets brushed against my legs.
It’s a slowing down, really being in the moment so that our bodies can have a chance to catch up with that is actually happening, right now. It is so easy to skip past these moments, but they are worth creating space for. This practice feels like a reset button, a way to centre myself on what matters the most to me and it’s also a gentle act of resistance in a world that is preaching the message that we need to be more, buy more and do more to feel fulfilled.
In my experience, it has been really easy to make this a practice because I am craving the feeling that it brings. It feels like I only had to clear away some of the overgrowth to reveal the well worn grooves of this pathway. It reminds me: our bodies are wired to experience goodness.
This week I hope you get to live through a truly good moment. One that calls you to slow down, maybe take a breath and allow your body to soak it all up. It might be something as small as biting into a perfectly ripe peach or the sensation of the sun shining onto your skin as you stroll in your garden. Whatever it is, I hope there is the space within your system to allow it to resource you, that you would feel open to receive all of the goodness coming your way.
Sending love,
Em x
If you’re new here, I’m Emily - a doula and emotional health practitioner. I share weekly (ish!) around nurture and nourishment for the transitions of womanhood. If you are curious about working together in a 1:1 capacity, I have currently have space for new clients. Click below if you’d like to chat some more. Thank you for being here!
I loved this post Emily, and actually remembered it when I was at the beach today. I watched my 3 kids play in the water with my husband and focused on the sand on my toes, the sound of the waves and the excited shrieks of my kids jumping the waves. It was nice to let myself sink into the moment so thank you for the inspiration ❤️